Tuesday, June 05, 2007

The Threat of a Pause

Given the evidence, I think it's safe to say I have too many things going on in life. Take this blog for example: I love writing, but I don't often seem to find the time to actually come here and post thoughts. It isn't that I don't have them or the desire to express them, but by the time I come home at night the last thing I seem to want to do is sit in front of the computer and write out what I've already surely expressed verbally all day - and probably much more proficiently.

I have, at least, finally transferred my favorite posts from my previous blog to this one, I kind of hate having thoughts in different places. Feel free to read and comment, afterall it may be new to you!


For those who didn't know, I have been rather sick of late. It's not a cold or cough. It's the kind of sick that could mean something is really wrong with you. My recent CT (Computed Tomography) turned up clear, and yet symptoms seem to persist. Guess that means I'm not super sick - or at least not with what they might have been expecting, but it does mean that they still don't know what's wrong with me. I guess they'll do more tests and we will see.


During this little span, I've had a little more time to think, and perhaps a little more prescence of mind to think as I have not been as driven by schedule and the necessities of this thing they keep telling me is "life." I keep wondering when the day will come when I accept their description without a scoff or juvenilesque retort.

But now that I have finally managed to slow down, the strangest thing seems to happen. There's so much I've been meaning to say, and I haven't the strength or the starting place to say it all. I guess that's the threat of a pause. Everything that's been swirling around starts to settle and you find out really quickly that there's a bit more than you guessed. Hopefully this summer will provide the energy, time and inspiration for good writing.